Translation of Biji's Online Connection June 11th 2020.
Biji - I am seeing that I get confused and tangled up a lot. In the night I feel a lot of discomfort. It’s like something is going to happen to me. I get stuck in the thought about what’s wrong with my body. Sometimes I feel pain in my heart and sometimes I feel like I am falling a lot. As I have been seeing myself more and more, yesterday I saw that when I was lying in the bed at night I felt huge discomfort. In the morning, as I came downstairs and sat down, what kept coming to me was 'no complaint, no complaint no complaint.'
Gurpreet - Yes
Biji - 'No complaint' opened me. The two nights when the discomfort was too much I felt I was going to die. That’s the only thing I can say about it.
Gurpreet - Yes
Biji - As the morning came, it itself came to me, 'no complaint no complaint.'
Gurpreet - Yes, now slowly, slowly you understand yourself. When you turn back and look you see the forces. Some forces we call good energy and some forces we call bad energy but these are just forces. If it is bad energy, or force, we start fighting with it or we try to push it away and that is also force. Now we need to turn our eyes towards it but not as something bad. Now you see these are two forces. The person runs after one force claiming it is good energy and runs away from or fights with the other force. These are forces. See them now. Two forces. Both forces have different tastes.
Biji - Yes, right.
Gurpreet - And these forces have different weights or heaviness. One force is heavier and the other force is not so heavy. Now understand these are two forces. Relax and see there is one force with which you fight and the other force you run after. And then there is also the third force. The third force is in which you want to sleep.
Biji - Yes, yes.
Gurpreet - Now see all three forces. Not one, not two, see all three. Then you will understand yourself.
Biji - When 'no complaint' came in me it changed my inside.
Gurpreet - Yes it changed, and what changed is good. And now you see if your eye is opened in all three forces together, at the same time, and you see all three forces together, then there is no day and night. Otherwise the night scares you and the day person runs after. Now without the difference of the day and night, see the forces together.
Biji - Okay
Gurpreet - First see the two forces, then see the third one as well. Be clear in these forces first. Sit back, relax and breathe and be clear in all three forces. You know the force of the nighttime and of the day time. And now you also know the third one in which you want to fall into. You see it as is. No force is either good or bad.
Biji - Not to go with good or bad.
Gurpreet - Be aware of all three forces at the same time.
Biji - I have labelled it as bad.
Gurpreet - Yes. Open your eyes in all three . . . relax and breathe . . . open your eyes in all three forces. The one that you fall into and the one you want to be over with, that also is a force.
Biji - Right.
Gurpreet - The way you are, sit back and relax and open your eyes in all three powers equally. There is no good or bad force. Opening your eyes in all three means you are beginning to understand them slowly. How they feel, how they taste and what kind of energy each one has.
Biji - Yes, I have put a bad label on the night time force. It's not good because it bothers me.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes. See the third one also. Understand it. No need to get it over with or let go of them. You need to understand these. No force needs to go away.
Biji - These are important pointers.
Gurpreet - So there is one force/energy, second force/energy and third force/energy. They occur at the same time. Breathe . . . see all together as the same. As we are talking about these three forces, now you tell me how you are in them.
Biji - I see nothing bad in any of them now.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes. Now you are able to breathe and be comfortable in them. Otherwise, the person shrinks in them.
Biji - Right.
Gurpreet - Be comfortable and open your eye the same way in all three forces. Every moment you will become more clear in all three forces.
Biji - I'm seeing how I had closed myself and I'm carrying the heaviness.
Gurpreet - Even if there is heaviness you still see all three forces the same way . . . two and three. As is, with the same eye . . . breathe.
Biji - I was very stuck in these stories.
Gurpreet - You said you were stuck, if it was, it is behind you. But now, don't push it back. See it as the same so your eye can see way back as if the wall was down and you can see all the way back. If there is a wall, you can't see all the way back. You can only see all the way back when the the wall is gone. Now understand the difference. If you say I was stuck, then there is wall. Now let the wall drop and see. You keep getting naked in your stuckness. Naked is old, old, ancient old. Pay attention to that. See with one eye. Nothing is good or bad. See all three forces. When you drop the wall you can see a lot more. There is more openness, you are not in a tight or narrow space even if it is old. Now when you are opening in the old, there is nothing that is good or bad.
Biji - Yes, not to go in the judgement of good or bad.
Gurpreet - Let the walls fall apart so you can continue to see.
Biji - I had made it very very big.
Gurpreet - See again . . . not creating the wall by saying it was . . . drop the walls. When the walls are dropped you can see that I am in it now. Whatever there was in the night time or daytime it's there now. Relax . . . now open your self . . . be naked . . . yes, I am in it. Now tell me as you are.
Biji - I have these weaknesses in me. Sometimes I cover it, sometimes I make something big. Sometimes good or bad. It keeps changing.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes. Now open your eyes in the three forces. All these things come in these three forces. If it is a mistake or weakness, there is no need to create the wall.
Biji - Yes, I have created walls.
Gurpreet - Yes, you can see now. What is behind the wall we make scary. When the wall is dropped, there is nothing scary there. The wall of 'I was' drop it. The wall of, 'I get stuck' drop it. Be naked. That I am. Take a little deeper breath in the nakedness. Speak from where you are now even if it is old that you are seeing.
Biji - My head is down in everything.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes, but don't create the wall because even when our head is down we become one with that and the wall is created. We are dropping the walls, as is.
Biji Yes, as is.
Gurpreet - Breathe as the walls are coming down. Person has created some old walls and still creates some new. Understand this now. Even from small, small things, like if the head is down, that creates a wall.
Biji - Right.
Gurpreet - Stay as you are now so your energy can return to your beingness. Remember the energy that is returning back; sometimes the taste feels good and sometimes bitter. You need to swallow it. Swallow both sweet or bitter, the same way. Even in the sweet taste there is no need to create the wall. At the same time, remember the third force as well as it pulls you down to close your eyes and fall asleep. If you see all three forces the same way, you are in yourself.
Biji - I go with when it feels good and also when it doesn't feel good. I go with that.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes. Remember the third force as well.
Biji - Now I am in my heart and I'm going down and down.
Gurpreet - Still, the walls are being created even when you are in your heart. When you are in your heart there is no need to create the wall. Even when you are small there is no need to create the wall because when the wall is created you shrink again. Walls need to be dropped as is. When we first see the three forces together with one eye, the person says something happened in my heart and the wall is created. When you open and drop that, you go further than that. Let go of your hand from the heart . . . now go to the third part, deeper inside. No need to create the wall.
Biji - Okay
Gurpreet - You know now where you are. Now your hand is removed from the heart. The wall that was created is dropped and your inner understands it.
Biji - Yes, yes.
Gurpreet - Breathe . . . be comfortable . . . keep opening and seeing. No need for the wall. How the wall is created . . . understand that too . . . yes, yes, yes catch yourself when the wall is created. It doesn't take time for the wall to be up as it is automatic. 'My heart, my body' that creates the walls. Keep dropping the walls.
Biji - I was seeing this and now I know as you are showing me, these are all walls.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes. Don't stop. Even if something happens in your heart there is no need to stop. Or something happens in your body, no need to stop. If something happens in 'my body' that creates a wall. Once the wall is created, the person stays in trying to break the wall and makes noise. Noise can't be heard as there is a wall there. Drop the walls, there is no fight once the walls are down and you can see far, way back. Yes, breathe . . . keep going and don't stop at the heart. When you don't stop at the heart, the I is not created.
Biji - When I feel something in my heart, I make it big.
Gurpreet - It is the same thing when you feel something in the body, that also, feeling something in the body, the I makes it big.
Biji - Yes.
Gurpreet - Keep opening your eyes, your secrets are being revealed to you. The secret is if you feel something in the body, the I makes it big. Remove your hand from your body. Drop the hand from your body and the noise that is happening in the body.
Biji - Okay.
Gurpreet - Yes . . . see if there is any hook or doubt about your body. Bring it in front of you right now so we can be clear in that too. Do you see any doubt about your body?
Biji - It feels like I am naked in it now.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes . . . as you say that something in the body hurts or there is pain in the heart, the secret of that, open it right now. Right now, here, so it can also be naked. The more secrets that are out, the more walls are dropped.
Biji - Yes.
Gurpreet - Yes, yes . . . like the way you are now, speak from there.
Biji - Walls keep on dropping, that's what I see.
Gurpreet - Yes. Yes, you can see now. Drop as many walls as you can see. Don't create the walls. When you see it, drop it, is clear to you.
Biji - Right, right, yes, right.
Gurpreet - Whatever is there, you need to take it through your throat, inside. When you swallow something inside through your throat, you know it and feel it has gone inside of you. Now you know what it's like to take something through your throat. Take it in through your throat, whatever is there. We don't normally take anything past our throat and if we do we stay at the heart level. Now we need to go further than that. Now we need to let go of our hand from the heart as well and go to the third part, deeper inside. The third part is like your stomach and spine. Keep going deeper and deeper. Remove your hand, drop your walls.
Biji - I see the walls and I see them drop.
Gurpreet - Yes. Whatever is coming in front of you, bring it in now so it does not create the walls. If it creates the walls you will go up and down with it again. Now you see how freeing being naked is. Don't hesitate from being naked, whatever it is, bring it in, bring it in front so it can be naked.
Biji - Keep taking the lids off, keep taking the lids off.
Gurpreet - When the lid is off, it needs to go down the throat as well. Sometimes it is bitter and sometimes it is sweet. We need to swallow it and take it inside our body.